I love my prayer journal. I love my bible study journals. Multiple, because, why not? Plus, I mean, multiple days for multiple topics, and there was so much pretty things and stationary and sense of purpose….
You see what I’m getting at?
I dunno when it happened, but it just dawned on me that so much of my journaling was – probably is to be honest – just about the action. having journals, making use of all those notebooks and pretty journals I collected over the years, then having an excuse to buy more. It’s bible study after all. Improving prayer life. Learning how to be a better Christian.
And yes, all those things are necessary. All those things are important in and of themselves. And having specific themes and topics studied and put down for later reference does come in handy. You are studying after all. Just like school, it’s good to have notes at your fingertips when it comes to learning, and being ready, and preparing to apply it.
Still, I have to admit Pinterest is a good source to start, but I think I’m getting a little too tied up in the presentation and potential of it all. I have my own method, and it’s working great for me. Still I’m looking for more, and how to be more creative, how to make my stuff more Pinterest worthy.
It cheapens the whole process. Almost falsifies it, I think. I dunno.
Presentation is important, true.
But life isn’t always perfect or presentable. There are ups and downs. Messes, perfect triumphs however big or small.
When I started my prayer journal, I knew it wouldn’t be perfect. I knew there would be scratches and messy colouring, perfect handwriting, messy handwriting, lots of rewording because I never properly think through what i want to say and how I should say it. And in the beginning, remembering this, I was happy with it. I felt more…. purposeful. Now, looking at the posts and submissions on Pinterest, I’m getting a little less happy. Feeling like I could do better. Do more, make it prettier. Same with my bible study journals.
That’s a mistake on my part.
It’s a new day and a new chance to get back on track. First step is to admit my problems and mistakes. Next step is to do.
Maybe it’s time to close the tab.